Since starting therapy, I have been so emotional. I didn’t cry last session though which made me feel proud that I’d kept it together, but when I got home I felt like shit. This showed me that suppressing the urge to cry is worse than crying. I am going to do my best to explain this honestly.
I am not as “ok” as I thought. The truth is that there are times when I’m feeling a little better and times when I feel hopeless. My recent posts have indicated that I have tried and found treatments that work for me, but the deal is that although they help, they didn’t cure. Pot really is the best sleep aid I’ve tried and shrooms did bring me off the ocd ledge quite a bit, but I am just now learning that my coping mechanisms are not going to save me and that I’ve got to work through this myself.
I don’t write this to erase the opinions I’ve expressed about certain treatments, but rather to stop suppressing the feelings i have, even if i dont enjoy feeling them.